Subtle notes

61 thoughts
last posted Oct. 26, 2019, 4:03 p.m.

5 earlier thoughts

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Yesterday I told Carlotta about the "snuggling bubbles" and also how yesterday morning I experienced a larger bubble: a sphere encompassing my whole body, with my crown at the top and my feet somewhere near the bottom. This sphere pulsated with the beat of my physical heart. I wondered out loud how to relate this outer sphere (which seemed content to stay that large) to the smaller knots of contraction contained in my body and thus within the sphere. "They can't exactly snuggle, right?" What she saw and related to me in that moment was a baby in utero, bathing in amniotic fluid. I told her thank you for the metaphor; I now have another practice tool.

Well, this morning, after an evening full of synchronicity, awakening through conversation with my spiritual friends, reminders of Divine love, and of a deep, exciting sense of convergence around the possibilities for my marriage... I sensed the sphere again, as well as the raw, tender part that craves connection and has felt so overwhelmed for so long having to keep the world at bay, compressed in on all sides and barely able to move. I realized that it now has a buffer and doesn't have to keep the world at bay anymore. The outer surface of the sphere guards me like a father, and the inner space embraces me like a mother, giving me plenty of room to move and breathe and grow. Now I can rest and take in her nourishment. I could feel streaming energy into my navel as if my umbilical cord had been reattached.

Emotional content: love, gratitude, peace, excitement, Eros

Mental content: the above metaphor, as well as thinking about the specific unfolding of events in my life with glimpses of future possibilities

Physical characteristics: streaming tears, some quiet weeping, continual releases of contraction into deeper breathing

55 later thoughts